If you're listening to this in one of those seasons where life feels messy and hard — sis, hear me before we even start: you are not broken, you are not behind, and you are not alone.
Today's message is simple, and it's straight from my heart. So many of us are waiting — waiting to feel ready, waiting to be recovered, waiting to be smaller or better or "fixed" — before we let ourselves actually live. But your life is happening right now, whether you give yourself permission or not. And I don't want you to miss it.
This one's for you if you're stuck in the messy middle, four steps forward and two steps back, wondering when your real life gets to start.
The lie that keeps you waiting
There's a part of you with dreams — the part that knows you were meant for so much more than days consumed by food and body thoughts. The part that wants to show up fully, chase what's on your heart, laugh without calculating calories.
And then there's the other voice: "Not yet. Not until you're smaller. Not until you've got this eating thing figured out. Not until you've recovered."
Sis, that voice is keeping you alone on your own island. One of my clients said it perfectly: "I keep thinking I need to wait until I'm recovered enough to start living — but I'm realizing that waiting for a perfect future is just another way the eating disorder is controlling me." That was her breakthrough. It can be yours too.
Recovery isn't the waiting room for your life — it IS the living
Here's the truth: recovering is the process of learning to live. It's not something you do and then start your life. It's the journey itself.
And your eating disorder wants you to wait — because as long as you're waiting, you keep believing you need to be fixed, worthy, or "better" before you're allowed to take up space, want things, or pursue your dreams. But you don't need permission, sis. Not for food, not for rest, not for growth, not for a new hobby. This is your life.
Because here's what's real: life doesn't pause while you figure out your relationship with food. Your dreams don't go on hold. Your purpose doesn't wait. How much more time do you want to give away?
3 ways to start making life happen (instead of waiting for it)
1. Name one dream you've put on hold.
Just one. The thing you keep saying you'll do when you're better, when you have more energy, when the kids are older. Maybe it's applying for a job, taking a dance class, calling a friend you've been avoiding, forgiving someone, going on a date with your husband — or getting honest and reaching out for support. Write it down. Don't analyze it, don't judge it. Just name it.
2. Take the smallest possible step.
Not the biggest step. Not the perfect step. The smallest. If it's the job, look at one posting. If it's the dance class, just find the studio's website (and nourish yourself with a good meal before you go). The eating disorder says it's all or nothing — but recovery, and life, are built on tiny, imperfect actions taken consistently.
3. Remind yourself: you are living your recovery right now.
This mindset shift changes everything. Instead of "I'm waiting to recover," flip it to "I am living my recovery now. I'm giving myself permission to heal now." Every time you choose connection over isolation, pursue something that lights you up instead of restricting, or show up imperfectly — that is recovery. That's life.
The honest part
I won't lie to you — this isn't linear or easy. Some days you'll feel like you're moving backward. Some days you'll still hate your body, the thoughts will still be there, maybe even louder. But you don't have to wait until those days are gone to start living in them. Struggling doesn't mean you're doing it wrong — it means you're human, and it means you're about to do something brave.
Your eating disorder is not who you are. She doesn't get the whole story of your life — she's not even the most interesting part of it. But you'll never know what the rest of your story looks like if you keep waiting for permission to write it.
A few lines from the episode
"You are not broken. You are not behind. You are not alone."
"Recovering is the process of learning to live. It's the journey itself."
"You don't need permission. This is your life."
"Life doesn't pause while you figure out your relationship with food."
"Every time you show up imperfectly — that is recovery. That's life."
"Your eating disorder doesn't get the whole story. She's not even the most interesting part of it."
"Your life is waiting for you — not the other way around."
Your work this week
- Name one dream you've put on hold — write it down.
- Take the smallest possible step toward it.
- Remind yourself: I am living my recovery right now.
You're allowed to want things. You're allowed to dream, to pursue, to have purpose — especially in the middle of healing. Your life is happening right now. Not when you're thinner, not when you're better. Right now.
You don't have to walk this alone
Connect with Lindsey:
🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms
Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show:
💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week!
Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now.
Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly.
*While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.
