What if the more you loved your life, the less willing you became to compromise yourself for a relationship?
In this episode, I’m talking about compromise in relationships, solitude, self-love, and the difference between making room for someone and making yourself smaller to keep them.
After watching the now-viral Eartha Kitt interview clip where she speaks about wanting a love that appreciates the way she loves herself and wants to join her there, I started thinking about what it really means to build a relationship from a place of wholeness.
Because healthy relationships do require compromise. But there is a difference between compromising in a relationship and compromising your life for a relationship.
When you become comfortable with your solitude and stop seeing singleness as something you need to be rescued from, you begin to choose differently. You can want marriage without needing any particular man to give you a marriage. You can want love without accepting every version of it. And you can allow a man to be interested in you without assuming that means he belongs in your life.
I’m also talking about why women sometimes compromise too much because they’re afraid that becoming too fulfilled on their own will leave them alone forever—and why I believe the opposite can be true.
The right relationship should have room for the woman you already are.
It shouldn’t require you to become smaller, quieter, less ambitious, less independent, or less yourself just to make the relationship work.
You don’t have to stop wanting love.
You just have to stop needing it badly enough to betray yourself to have it.
And as a woman who married later in life, I share what I’ve learned about entering marriage after you’ve already built a life of your own—and why I believe the best relationships aren’t about finding someone to complete your life, but finding someone who fits into the life you’ve already learned to love.
In this episode:
• The difference between healthy compromise and self-abandonment
• Why solitude changes how you choose relationships
• Why being wanted doesn’t automatically mean you should choose someone
• How fear of being alone can make us overcompromise
• Why a relationship should add to your life rather than take you away from it
• What Eartha Kitt’s perspective can teach us about self-love and partnership
• Why you can want marriage and still refuse to settle
• How becoming fulfilled on your own can change the kind of love you’re willing to accept
If this resonates, share it with a woman who needs the reminder that she doesn’t have to make her life smaller to make room for love.
Videos mentioned:
📺Eartha Kitt Interview clip: https://youtu.be/vyN3eBRYcDo?is=ISMx09mFymZaardM
📺 “I Didn’t Do Anything Special to Get husband” https://youtu.be/CkMcBe_5bIs?is=DloetA302ZtrzxfF
📺 “Being done with love is not that bad of a place to be in…” https://youtu.be/kVeGzUWUDOc?is=qxqXd4BbMbwBM5BI
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