Self-love isn’t a pep talk—it’s the foundation that makes pleasure possible. In this intimate conversation, Monique Carmela and I get practical about dissolving shame, regulating your nervous system, and letting desire return—especially in long-term relationships and real-life seasons like motherhood and stress.

We unpack why “doing more” often backfires, how curiosity and compassion soften resistance, and how tiny self-devotions (breath in bed, shower rituals, a five-minute hand massage) build momentum without pressure. You’ll learn how to reframe “pleasure practice” as simple “time for me,” create a weekly devotional that actually fits your life, and expand your capacity to feel—so you naturally expand your capacity for pleasure and connection.

You’ll learn:

  • A body-based approach to self-love that calms your nervous system

  • How to meet shame and resistance without shutting down

  • Micro-practices you can weave into busy days

  • Why devotion beats discipline for sustainable intimacy

Resources mentioned:

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