On today’s listener series episode of the Birth Trauma Mama Podcast, Kayleigh welcomes Shelby to share the story of her traumatic birth experience and the unexpected complications that changed her life forever. What began as a planned C-section due to placenta previa and cholestasis quickly became a life-threatening emergency involving severe hemorrhaging, multiple interventions, blood transfusions, and ultimately an emergency hysterectomy. Shelby later learned that placenta accreta was the underlying cause of her hemorrhage.
Shelby opens up about the physical and emotional aftermath of her birth trauma, including the numbness and shock she experienced, the grief of losing her ability to have more children, the pressure she felt around breastfeeding, and the importance of getting support. She also shares how medication, her husband and family, and hearing other birth trauma stories helped her heal. Most importantly, Shelby reminds us that birth trauma doesn't simply disappear because a healthy baby came home—and that partners can experience trauma, too.
In this episode, Shelby and Kayleigh talk about:
🩸 A life-threatening postpartum hemorrhage — Shelby describes losing nearly five liters of blood and requiring multiple blood transfusions and emergency interventions.
🏥 The rapid escalation of her birth experience — From a planned C-section to a room full of doctors, a Bakri balloon, Jada, uterine embolization, and ultimately an emergency hysterectomy.
💔 The emotional impact of an emergency hysterectomy — Shelby talks about the complicated grief of knowing she would not be able to have another child and how difficult it was to process that reality while also caring for her newborn.
🧠 The numbness that can follow birth trauma — Shelby shares how she initially struggled to understand the severity of what had happened to her and how the reality of her trauma slowly began to sink in after she returned home.
🍼 Breastfeeding, formula, and postpartum pressure — Shelby opens up about feeling pressure to pump and breastfeed despite her body recovering from massive blood loss and multiple surgeries, and how she ultimately gave herself permission to prioritize her own healing.
💊 Finding support through medication — Shelby shares why antidepressant medication became an important part of her recovery and why she believes there should be less stigma around getting the help you need.
🤍 The importance of community and hearing other stories — Listening to other birth trauma survivors helped Shelby realize she wasn't alone, and eventually inspired her to share her own story.
👨👩👦 Supporting partners after traumatic births — Shelby emphasizes that partners can also experience significant trauma while watching someone they love fight for their life, and encourages people to check in on them, too.
🌱 Healing while carrying grief — Even years later, moments involving other babies and the thought of her son not having a sibling can bring up difficult emotions. Shelby talks about learning to hold both the grief and gratitude at the same time.
✨ Finding light after trauma — Shelby reflects on how her experience has changed her as a mother, making her more present and patient, while acknowledging that healing doesn't mean forgetting or erasing the pain.
This episode is a powerful reminder that a healthy baby does not erase a traumatic birth. You can be deeply grateful for your child while still grieving what happened to you—and both things can be true at the same time.
For more birth trauma content and a community full of love and support, head to my Instagram at @thebirthtrauma_mama.
Learn more about the support and services I offer through The Birth Trauma Mama Therapy & Support Services.
Disclaimer - The views and opinions expressed by guests on The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the official stance, views, or positions of The Birth Trauma Mama Podcast. The content shared is for informational purposes only and should not be considered as professional or medical advice and/or endorsement.
