Brian Pennie's story is extraordinary.
After spending 15 years addicted to heroin, Brian completely changed the direction of his life. He went on to achieve a PhD studying psychology and neuroscience, lecture at Trinity College Dublin and UCD, write Bonus Time, and front the RTÉ series Hooked: How Addiction Hijacks Your Brain.
But this conversation isn't really about heroin.
It's about why human beings do the things we do, even when we know they're hurting us.
Brian talks incredibly openly about the anxiety he experienced from a young age and why, for a long time, heroin wasn't the problem in his life. It felt like the solution. It gave him something he didn't know how to give himself.
And that took us into a much bigger conversation.
What if instead of simply asking "How do I stop this behaviour?", we started asking:
"What is this behaviour doing for me?"
We talk about emotional eating, alcohol, phones, scrolling, overworking, and all the different ways we try to escape discomfort.
We explore dopamine and the modern environment we've created, where incredibly powerful rewards are available almost instantly and with very little effort. Are our brains actually equipped for a world of endless food, entertainment, gambling, shopping, social validation, and stimulation sitting in our pockets?
We talk about why knowing what to do is rarely enough to make us do it. Self-deception. Anxiety. Identity. The stories we repeatedly tell ourselves. The difference between understanding why you behave a certain way and using your circumstances as a reason never to change.
And we ask a question I think is incredibly important:
Can two things be true at once? Can your behaviour make complete sense because of everything you've experienced, while you still remain responsible for changing it?
Brian also shares what 15 years of addiction taught him about time, happiness, and what actually matters. We talk about values, mortality, connection, discomfort, and why a life that looks successful isn't necessarily a life well lived.
This is one of those conversations that went far beyond where I expected it to.
It's raw. Fascinating. At times uncomfortable. And incredibly hopeful.
Because if there's one thing Brian's life demonstrates better than almost anything else, it's this:
Who you've been does not have to determine who you become.
