Episode 144: The Shala Matrix with My Brother Casey (Part 2)

The Shala Matrix with My Brother Casey (Part 2)

Start with Part 1: Same House, Different Stories with My Brother Casey

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Content note: this episode includes childhood physical and emotional abuse and a parent's addiction.

Same mother, different roles. My brother Casey and I talk about emotional incest, the surrogate spouse role, parentification, and the anxious attachment a mother can create by withdrawing her love, then what those roles built in us as adults and what it's like to grieve a parent who's still alive.

We discuss:

• Family roles in a dysfunctional family
• Emotional incest and the surrogate husband role
• Parentification and codependency with a parent
• Silent treatment, guilt trips, and anxious attachment to a mother
• An avoidant mother and the child who chases her love
• Hypervigilance, overfunctioning, and perfectionism from childhood
• Money trauma and growing up poor
• Healing by changing your environment
• Going no contact with your mother
• Grieving a parent who's still alive
• Deconditioning and reclaiming your authentic self