Let's look at Episode 189 recording from another perspective.
Sobriety rarely happens in a straight line — and if you've relapsed and feel like you're back at square one, you're not failing at recovery, you're likely missing a piece of it.
In this video, Gary explains why "white-knuckling" and willpower alone tend to collapse under pressure, and why lasting sobriety depends on treating the trauma underneath the addiction — not just managing the behaviour. If you've fallen down, this is how you get back in the fight.
Shame and self-criticism are often the real barrier to recovery — not the addiction itself, but the belief underneath it that you're not worth the work of healing. Trained sex and porn addiction specialist [Gary] walks through a practical 30-day self-compassion exercise designed to rebuild the distorted self-perception that years of shame and self-chastisement can create.
Gary trained under Thaddeus Birchard, founder of ATSAC (The Association for the Treatment of Sex Addiction and Compulsivity) — often described as the UK's foundational figure in the field. ATSAC is the body that shaped how sex and porn addiction is treated clinically in the UK.
Gary works with both addicts and their partners through separate, specialist pathways, and hosts The Sex Addiction Podcast (67K+ downloads, 189 episodes). If shame is keeping you stuck, this exercise is where to start.
TAGS:
Core/broad: Sex addiction, porn addiction, Love Addiction, sex addiction expert, sex addiction recovery, betrayal trauma
Specific/technical: Why sex addiction is destructive, sex addiction and the brain, dopamine addiction, neurochemical addiction, sex addiction trauma, compulsive sexual behaviour
Intent-based: Signs of sex addiction, how sex addiction affects relationships, is sex addiction real, sex addiction help, effects of porn addiction on relationships
Credibility/framework tie-in: ATSAC Therapist, trained by Thaddeus Birchard, sex addiction specialist UK, accredited sex addiction therapist
Long-tail: Why sobriety feels impossible, relapse doesn't mean failure, how to recover from a relapse in sex addiction
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