A year ago when our ADD student daughter then aged 21 revealed to my husband and myself that she was on a waiting list to have cross sex treatment, our 16-year-old son took the role of her trans ally. My husband said he would tolerate her having a partial mastectomy. My family doctor referred me to Mermaids. I called them and found there was no space for parents to feel grief, only acceptance.

I thought the world had gone mad and I should take my exit. 

Since then a lot has happened, a lot of shouting, a lot of crying, nights alone in hotel rooms when I couldn't bear to be in the house with my husband and son. I then made huge efforts to find other parents who felt the same and bring them together. My husband and son seem to have changed their tune and don't now support my daughter's position. 

I worry about our daughter's welfare when our time has ended but don't trust her decision making. I want her to have a roof over her head where she may not be able to manage a home herself. I have got a lawyer to draft up a family trust which becomes active when we die, to be managed by our son and my younger brother and family, stipulating any help will stop if she uses money to advance any physical transitioning or furthering of the trans ideology. Though he seems to be growing up well, has a long-term sweetheart where they are smitten with each, it's putting a lot of pressure on our son where he isn't yet an adult.

 

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