Dating has a strange way of pulling us out of ourselves. Instead of meeting the person across from us, we begin watching ourselves through their eyes: Am I saying the right thing? Do they want me?
The Baal HaTurim finds a remez to Elul in the words אֶת לְבָבְךָ וְאֶת לְבַב—“your heart and a heart.” By leaving out the word זַרְעֶךָ, the identity of that second heart remains open. The pasuk is revealing something about the mysterious way one heart reaches another
Drawing on Rebbe Nachman’s teaching that every person possesses a unique inner nekudah capable of awakening someone else’s heart, this shiur explores why real attraction cannot be manufactured through performance. Sometimes the deepest work of dating is learning to remain inside yourself long enough for another person to actually meet you.
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