The hardest part of psychosis isn’t what people think.
For me, it wasn’t surviving psychosis. It was learning how to live with everything that came after.
The relationships I damaged. The years of memories my family and I will never get back. The shame that kept me from reconnecting with the people I loved most.
In this deeply personal episode of Psychic or Psychosis? (Jesus Take the Wheel), I’m reading one of my Substack essays, written three months ago before this podcast even launched, about the part of my recovery that has been the hardest to heal.
But something happened this week that brought that essay full circle.
After nearly three years of carrying grief, regret, and shame, I finally found the courage to take a step I’d been afraid to take for years.
I’m also opening up about one of the most emotionally challenging weeks I’ve experienced in a long time, the unexpected temptation to break my sobriety, and what it means to keep choosing healing even when it’s hard.
This episode is about forgiveness, family, faith, and the realization that while we can’t get back the time or memories we’ve missed out on, we still have the power to create new ones.
And sometimes, the very door we’ve been waiting for God to open is the one we need to find the courage to knock on ourselves.
I don’t know what happens next. But I’m choosing hope.
It’s a beautiful day for living™
Music Credit: “Hope Never Dies (Never Give Up)” by Fearless Soul. Used with permission under a licensing agreement.
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