This week, I had the absolute pleasure of sitting down with the incredible Alex Partridge—founder of UNILAD and Lad Bible, host of the ADHD Chatter podcast, and author of Why Does Everybody Hate Me?.
We dove deep into a topic that so many managers want to get right, but often feel totally lost navigating: supporting neurodiversity in the workplace, specifically when it comes to ADHD.
The first time I managed someone with ADHD, I felt lost. I wanted to be an ally and build an inclusive space, but I didn't know what real, everyday support looked like.
As Alex and I chatted, it hit me again how much untapped creativity, innovation, and resilience lies within our neurodivergent team members—if we actually build environments where they can thrive. When we take a step back, set aside our assumptions, and approach people with genuine curiosity, we don't just become better leaders, we create workplaces where everyone feels safe enough to drop the mask and bring their whole self to work.
Key Takeaways & Themes
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Understanding Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD). "Children with ADHD are exposed to 20,000 extra micro-rejections in their formative years. Over a child's life, they add up, they compound, and they create an adult who suffers from extreme emotional pain when someone criticizes you or rejects you as an adult."
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Recognizing the Worksite Manifestations of RSD. "If you are living your life constantly expecting criticism or rejection around every single corner, you put up a guard to protect yourself. It means you can't do anything unless it's perfect. You'll stay in the office four hours later than everyone else, or you'll stay up all night simply to complete that work to such a high standard because the thought of your boss even making a tiny correction to it is so painful."
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Building Psychological Safety from the Top Down."When people in the office observe vulnerability coming from the top, that trickles down to them, and it creates the impression that if they ask for help. It sends the message that they can make that ask without fear of it being met with any kind of eye roll."
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The High Cost of Failing to Accommodate Neurodiversity."80% of neurodivergent employees actually leave a company within three months post-the hiring stage because they are too anxious in that environment to do the job that they're able to do."
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Fostering Allyship Through Curiosity Rather Than Judgment. "Approach the whole conversation with curiosity rather than judgment. Always have an open mind and have that curiosity to ask yourself, 'Maybe that is the better way to do it?' When that mindset shifts, then suddenly there's a whole door of possibilities that open up to you."
Concluding Actionable Takeaway
Leading with Open-Ended Support: Instead of singling employees out by pointing to specific neurodivergent traits or diagnosing behaviors, leaders should proactively offer broad, company-wide avenues for help—and regularly ask a simple, open-ended question like, "Is there anything I can help you with?" or "Do you want five minutes to think about that assignment before taking it on?"
Follow Alex at https://www.alex-partridge.com/
