From Suicidal Thoughts To Gratitude - Adam Moen (ep. 1003)

I have the honor of sitting down with someone whose story truly redefines what it means to turn pain into purpose. Meet Adam Moen—a former high‑achiever who, after years of relentless pressure, self‑medication, and even a brush with the law, found himself standing on the very edge of suicide.

What saved him wasn’t a miracle; it was a hard‑earned gratitude for the very emotions he’d spent his whole life trying to hide. In therapy, Adam learned to face his sadness, anger, and frustration head‑on, to see them not as flaws but as fuel. That shift sparked an incredible transformation: he began volunteering with NAMI, speaking on stages—including TED—, and ultimately created Avalo, a free, anonymous app that bridges the gap between people in crisis and the peer‑and‑professional support they need.

In today’s conversation we’ll explore:

• How embracing negative emotions can be a powerful catalyst for growth.
• The cultural roadblocks—especially for men—that keep us from seeking help, and how Adam is tearing those down.
• The practical steps Adam took to ask for help, build a supportive network, and turn his darkest moments into a mission that’s now helping countless others.

If you’ve ever felt stuck, ashamed, or alone, stay tuned. Adam’s journey from despair to empowerment—and the tools he’s built to make it easier for anyone to reach out—might just be the spark you need to start your own gratitude‑driven comeback.

Let’s dive in.

Resources:

Adam's website: https://www.adammoen.me/

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Timestamps:

• 03:23 – Guest Adam Moen introduced – his gratitude journey, suicide survival, and free mental‑health app.
• 03:53 – Quick personal background request; Adam’s gratitude‑focused story begins.
• 04:01 – Adam’s high‑achievement school/family environment and early pressures to excel.
• 05:38 – Parental drive for success left little room for “non‑optimal” emotions; limited emotional conversation.
• 06:28 – Adam avoided discussing personal challenges, turned to drugs and alcohol as self‑medication.
• 07:02 – “Work hard, play hard” mentality; unfulfilling jobs and questioning his life direction.
• 07:26 – Loss of hope and increasing bleakness in his early twenties.
• 07:42 – Brain’s problem‑solving drive: statistical split of positive vs. negative days leading toward suicidal thoughts.
• 08:20 – Rising negative‑day ratio triggers suicidal ideation; near‑attempts.
• 08:50 – Continued wallowing; finally reaches out to family for help.
• 09:13 – Parents’ initial supportive but dismissive response (“just a phase”).
• 09:48 – Rock‑bottom incident (legal trouble) forces parents to recognize seriousness; therapy begins.
• 10:40 – Early therapy progress; first time Adam names his sadness to friends.
• 11:05 – Observation of pervasive sadness on campus sparks deeper interest in mental health.
• 11:37 – Growing focus on peer support, help‑seeking behavior, and research.
• 12:16 – Abandons ruthless corporate climb; reshapes life goals after suicide experience.
• 13:05 – Discussion of men’s difficulty expressing emotions; societal competitiveness.
• 13:55 – Citing research & psychologist friend on men’s openness to mental‑health talk.
• 14:34 – Intersection of rape culture, Me Too, and mental‑health stigma on campus.
• 15:10 – Men’s emotional suppression linked to violence; Adam’s own self‑harm as outlet.
• 15:40 – Approach to men: treat emotional expression as a skill to be learned, not a shameful flaw.
• 16:27 – Sports analogy: we train physical skills but neglect emotional “training.”
• 16:42 – Skill‑building metaphor: like toddlers learning to walk, emotions need practice.
• 17:09 – Therapy provides safe space; fuels Adam’s advocacy for help‑seeking.
• 17:44 – Emphasizes practice and time to become proficient at emotional talk.
• 18:00 – (Advice segment) First step: find a comfortable forum to explore feelings.
• 19:08 – Step 1: Ask for help; acknowledge it’s okay not to solve everything alone.
• 19:49 – Step 2: Seek expert guidance – therapists, coaches, peer‑support, HR, etc.
• 20:20 – Build a supportive network; importance of therapist‑client fit.
• 21:10 – Poor first therapist matches can discourage; Avalo aims to improve matching.
• 21:49 – Introduction to Avalo: app designed to pair users with appropriate mental‑health professionals.
• 22:32 – Avalo creates an anonymous, safe space for asking for help.
• 23:02 – Highlighting high barriers to mental‑health help in the U.S.
• 23:42 – Avalo lowers entry barriers: free, 100 % anonymous posting.
• 24:11 – Forum features, safety tools, and the goal of starting the conversation.
• 24:54 – Platform supports issues from “bad day” to acute suicidal thoughts.
• 25:13 – Not a crisis hotline; aims to spark first conversation; future NLP‑driven matching.
• 26:16 – Gratitude follows acknowledging all emotions; balanced approach vs. “toxic positivity.”
• 27:43 – Gratitude as a pivotal healing tool; re‑establishing relationship with sadness/anger.
• 28:49 – Resulting empathy leads to volunteering, peer‑support groups, and mental‑health activism.
• 29:16 – Summary of turning point: pain → gratitude → progress → app creation.
• 30:24 – Gratitude for the whole journey; shift from shame to grateful self‑awareness.
• 31:02 – Grateful for negative emotions despite cultural pressure for perpetual happiness.
• 31:53 – Negative emotions deemed useful rather than “locked away.”
• 32:26 – Eastern philosophy, gratitude meditation, journaling – tangible tools Adam adopted.
• 33:11 – Host admiration for Adam’s balanced gratitude practice and purpose‑finding.
• 35:04 – Community aspect of the app: users see others’ stories, reducing isolation.
• 35:47 – App is free for users and, in beta, for mental‑health professionals.
• 36:15 – Benefits of viewing others’ thought processes and connecting with preferred professionals.
• 37:01 – Avalo simplifies asking for help, shortening the path to support.
• 37:22 – Core mission: prevent suicide, help with any life challenge, provide light and perspective.
• 38:10 – Download information: avalo.app / “Avalo” in app stores.
• 38:31 – Host thanks Adam; notes pandemic‑related mental‑health stress.
• 39:02 – Closing gratitude to listeners and guest.

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