On one night in October, Ukrainian drones hit the second city of the Russian Federation in five places at once - the oil terminal, the Ручьи depot behind its useless nets, an Ozon warehouse the size of eleven football pitches, a bridge, and a VK data centre, whose press office then announced that everything was working as normal. The next evening Chief of the General Staff Gerasimov told Putin on camera that Dobropillia was taken and Russian troops stood five kilometres from Zaporizhzhia. Within hours the Z-channels were correcting him in public, and one admin explained how villages get "taken" now: a Mavic, fifteen seconds of footage, and an AI-generated soldier waving a flag.

This week on The Eastern Border: the Petersburg strikes and why Russian data has nowhere left to hide, the AI flag-planters, and Z-poets writing elegies for men who died for a photograph. Then the Duma budget hearings, where a Central Bank deputy chairman admitted that Ukrainian drones now set Russian monetary policy. Russian teachers posting pay slips while they staff the polling stations. Lawyers fleecing soldiers' families. Trump's "energy ceasefire", diesel deal and Starlink throttle. The deserter hunts in Bashkortostan. And the Russian officer with the upset stomach who, by the Wall Street Journal's count, helped Ukraine kill more than three hundred of his comrades.

«Ебём и плачем». Happiness is mandatory.

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