A MAGA influencer says he spent 18 days in a coma, met Jesus Christ, and returned to Earth with an important revelation: apparently Jesus is absolutely fucking yoked.
We listen to Gabe Poirot describe a "Mustang" Jesus with burning eyes and peak testosterone, then tumble down the increasingly bizarre rabbit hole of MAGA masculinity. Trump loves big strong men with tree-trunk legs. Pete Hegseth wants testosterone testing. And now apparently heaven has a CrossFit.
Plus, the internet unloads on the whole thing, we debate near-death experiences, and we unveil the Top 5 miracles performed by High-T Jesus.
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CHAPTERS
00:00 MAGA Guy Says He Met Jesus 01:04 The "Testosterone Jesus" Interview 02:40 Ripped Jesus Takes Over the Conversation 03:25 MAGA's Masculinity Obsession 04:24 Trump and His Big Strong Men 06:03 The Internet Roasts Mustang Jesus 07:56 Chapter 09:44 More Brutal Reactions 10:16 MAGA Defends "Manly Jesus" 11:27 Did He Actually See Jesus? 13:06 April Ajoy's Jesus Sketch 14:46 Top 5 High-T Jesus Miracles 16:12 The People's Hotline 16:42 Dangerous Call of the Day
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