Themes: Hyper-Independence Hypervigilance, Interdependency, Trauma, Childhood Wounds, Parentification, Emotional Neglect, Abandonment, Relationships, Inner Child, Healing.
Summary:
Were you described as the 'easy daughter'? Our 'independent child'? The one who 'always just takes care of herself so well'?
Yup, I've heard all of that hundreds of times too—and so may you! In today's episode, you and I will discuss how needing to grow up and become an adult way too early in your childhood can cause unwanted suffering in our lives—in other words, what hyper-independence is all about. We will explore where it originates, what it means, how it can negatively affect your life and how to release it. You will hear examples from my own life how it showed up for me, and my best tips on how to become healthily independent while also knowing how to count on others when needed.
(00:00) Intro
(01:22) What is hyper-independence
(02:51) The origins: emotional neglect and parentification
(05:25) The origins: abandonment wounds
(13:29) The connection between trauma, coping mechanisms & nervous system
(16:34) Challenges of hyper independence
(26:18) Negative effects of hyper independence
(30:49) The importance of learning to ask for help
(32:10) Inner child healing, play and reparenting
(37:03) Practicing vulnerability and self-compassion
