If I’m not the problem, then there is no solution. Huh? How does this make sense for my recovery.
Spencer, Eric and several listeners share our thoughts about this idea.
* How would you have felt about this statement before you came into recovery?* In what ways were you trying to fix other people’s problems?* Which of those problems was actually yours?* How did trying to fix someone else’s problems make you feel?* What did you hear when you came to Al-Anon that encouraged you to think differently?* What does this statement mean to you now?* How does that affect/change your behavior?* How is it liberating?* How does it contribute to less unmanageability and more serenity in your life?* Some problems I have* Failing to LET GO. My problem becomes, that I will be dragged. Example, my (Eric) marriage. Going to AA to take the medicine, to cure her disease.* If I fail to set healthy boundaries, I will become a doormat, and accept unacceptable behavior, and become resentful, angry, and irritable, without knowing it…* If I do not practice the art of listening, intently, with an OPEN MIND, I will not hear, understand, and lose my ability to have choices, and choose a response, that is healthy and best FOR ME.* These and many other problems, are OF MY OWN MAKING. The solutions are of my OWN choosing. I have the power to change this “stinking thinking”.* What solutions have we found?* Detachment* Boundaries* Acceptance
Eric concluded:
I can’t change the weather, the traffic, and I cannot drive the car in front of me. No matter how much I want to… I CAN change, my perspective, my outlook, and my attitude towards it.
There is a solution. I / we all, have the power to awaken within us, the courage to change, the things we can. And, I have come to know that that thing, is ME.
I will Let It Begin With Me.
Readings and Links
We read from How Al-Anon Works: p. 20 (in Chapter 4) Seeking Solutions for Ourselves, and Tradition 5, p. 113.
Spencer reflected on “Phase One” by Dilruba Ahmed, a poem about forgiving ourselves, which he heard on the podcast Poetry Unbound.
Gina told us about another Al-Anon podcast: www.al-anonuk.org.uk/podcasts
We were reminded of these other episodes:
* Freedom (241)* Perspective (258)* Enabling or Empowering? (261)* Consequences (245)* Resentment (196)
Feedback
If you have questions, comments, or shares on any of our episodes, you can call us at 734-707-8795 or email [email protected] with your questions or experience, strength and hope. Or just leave a comment right here.
Music from the Show
Coldplay – Fix You
I'm the Problem – Timothy Brindle
Man in the Mirror – Michael Jackson
