Here is looking at you, kid! It's Casablanca! What? You haven't seen Casablanca? Oh. Weird. You might want to do that or at the very least, never say those words out loud ever again. Don't ever tell somebody you haven't seen Casablanca. What're you stupid? You're not stupid. You're smart. Very smart. And handsome or beautiful or some non-gendered way to objectify your level of attraction. Believe in yourself. We believe in you. It's a good movie and you deserve to do something nice for yourself. Stop being so co-dependent. You don't need a man or a woman. You just need a couch and a tv or an airplane and a phone or a movie theater that is very specifically showing the Best Picture Winning film, Casablanca and if you don't have those things, maybe make better choices. A lot of this all depends on personal responsibility. You can try and blame other people for not having seen Casablanca OR you could splash some cold water on your face and get your act together. You're almost 39 for crissakes you can't keep doing this. It's all just hustle hustle hustle for gigs and then you spend the rest of the time trying to track down the money. What're you getting out of this? Sure, you make people laugh by the dozens at a time but is that it? Is that all you wanted to be? A stand up comedian, forever in debt to the ruling banks of this land? Grab a rock and smash the glass. This is an emergency. Grab that axe and cut the umbilical cord that's stuck in the machine of life like an old lady's foxwoods reward card attached to the oxygen tank on her jazzy stuck in a slot machine. Free yourself from the Matrix. I can't believe you forgot to mention the fucking Casablanca scene in Space Jam A New Legacy. The two of you/us watched that fucking thing and we didn't even think for a second that it was worth mentioning? Anyway. Good movie. 

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