Service (and all activities in life) is not so much about what you’re doing, but the intention behind it. And that intention can be positive without feeling artificial, strained or anything but authentic. I’ve found putting positive intention behind the simplest of activities (especially with anything I’m doing for others) can totally transform my relationships, joy of life, and general effectiveness doing anything. And it’s all an internal practice. All done covertly, with no need to project any sort of demeanor or convince anyone of your positive intentions.
Recommended pairings: my incredible interview with Dushan Zaric.
All of This is True...
Truly mastering your life requires closing the gap between how you’re feeling internally and what you are projecting externally. Everything must feel authentic and intentional. Learn how to do this without becoming a crass douchebag (that will result in even more conflict than your inner/outer dilemma).
Being fake nice is not effective and not necessary. This doesn’t mean honestly telling people that you hate them. But since everything is optional, know that so is the resentment you feel. You can shift out of that, see who they truly are, witness how the dynamic of enmity is an illusion, and form positive intentions that are actually genuine.
Quoting my mindful service inspiration, Dushan Zaric: “Nothing is wrong with the script.” You don’t need to rain sparkly joy on people. In fact, the right intentions can be projected with the utmost restraint and any situation will be uplifted.
Learn how to wish well upon people that give you every reason to hate them. And see how simple it is to shift your perspective while still authentically feeling what you feel about their problematic behavior.
Using positive intention on yourself to transform your sense of your value. You’re not doing enough of it, so do it more.
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