‘Oh, please, God, no. I can’t become a father again at, like, 42’

“I think I’ve finally figured it out,” I go – and, yeah, no, I’m talking about the latest restrictions. “If I set the alorm for, like, 2am and give the kids their breakfast, that’ll mean we can move lunchtime back to, say, 8am, which will mean that I’ll have my stomach properly lined when I stort drinking at 10am."

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.